Oh, the joys of traveling. There’s nothing quite like a random woman stealing your neck rest mid-flight and refusing to give it back or a druggie overdosing next to you on the bus. Unfortunately, I’ve been through more travel horror stories than what I would expect a normal person to have. But, because I am always going to and from one place or another constantly dealing with minor travesties along the way, I now consider myself to be the Martha Stewart of packing. Just minus the money and jail sentence. That one I can live without, though apparently, she had a pretty sweet set up.
Here’s a list of my top items, and below what my packing list looks like 🙂
If you know me personally, you would know that I like to feel clean and germ-free. Unfortunately, though, I frequently find myself in germy situations, though I am unaware of this harsh reality at the time. To set the scene, on a trip to NY, I was so horrified by how overcrowded and microbe-infested the subway was, I got off at one of the sketchiest parts of the city and bought an economy-sized bottle of hand sanitizer. First of all, of course I would have preferred pocket size, but 7/11 had some limited options that day. Beggars can’t be choosers, friends. All I can say is yes I got laughed at toting around a 1 pound bottle of sanitizer but did I get sick during that trip? No, I certainly did not! Who’s laughing now? Another friendly tip, If you happen to come across someone carrying a 1 pound bottle of sanitizer and proceed to laugh at them but then ask for some moments later, take a minute to reconsider. Said person may not, in fact, be the Mother Teresa of the subway, and there’s a good chance that they will be unwilling to forgive and forget. I know a lot of people have mixed feeling about hand sanitizer but personally, it has become imperative to my survival. College will whack your immune system like a Piñata. I always use an organic sanitizer so I don’t feel so bad. Regardless of how you feel about sanitizer, I think it’s undeniable that life can hit you with one too many moments where you wished you had something to clean your hands with. Unless of course, you fear nothing. In that case, I wish you all the best!
If you’re flying, you simply need something to support the old noggin! I learned this the hard way, and I’ll never be making that mistake again. My neck looked like a question mark by the time I touched down. Funny enough, one time I actually forgot my neck rest and realized this halfway to the airport. I screamed “STOP, MY NECKREST!” and made my mom and 5-star chauffeur drive me all the way back home so I could snatch it up. 4 hours later I’m sitting as contently as someone who’s not in first-class could be with my beloved neck rest. “How wonderful life is with you, sweet neck-rest,” I thought. In that moment of bliss, a tragedy occurred. My neck rest became suicidal and fell from my seat to the lady in the back of me’s lap. I thought, “No worries, I’ll just say sorry and get it back.” HA! Absolutely false. Turns out I was sitting in front of satan’s redneck cousin, Jolene. If she hasn’t taken your man yet, she will take your neck rest. This sunburnt tomato of a woman in an American flag shirt and matching cap literally grabbed my neck rest and put it behind her head and refused to give it back until I forcefully stole it back at the end of the flight. This was a capital offense if you ask me, and I’m still speaking with my lawyers about this travesty. I’ll let you know when she’s convicted.
A Good Book (or Decoy):
There’s never a better time to settle in and read a good book than when you’re suspended in a tin can magically floating in the air with no wifi. Fun fact: Last time I was reading a book on the plane, it served as a fabulous conversation starter with the cutest guy ever who just so happened to be sitting next to me. (Shout out God! Better than the lady last time on her way to rehab going through withdrawals!) We were both pretending to be immersed in our books, and then eventually came clean that we weren’t interested in them at all and talked for the rest of the flight. Great for us, not for the lady in the back of us who told us to shut up. Ahem, very rude. Can’t you see I’m getting the most attention I’ve had in centuries?! Also, this was a morning flight. It was like 10am, so keep your comments to yourself lady, I was using my inside voice.
If you forget your chargers, you will die. These are simply the facts. Nothing more to say about that.
Nothing terrifies me more than not being able to listen to music in public. One of my worst nightmares. If I ever got stuck on over a 3-hour flight and had no tunes to dull the horrors around me I would probably lose what’s left of my mind. Please don’t be one of those people that think it’s ok to listen to stuff on blast without earbuds on a plane. Those people are an entirely different breed of human and I would love to see their ancestory.com results. They all have to be related to the same obnoxious person. Bevis? Perhaps, Butthead?
Any extended period of time where you have limited options for what you can do is a great time to write. I love to write down what I’m grateful for, any ideas that pop into my head (lmao, like I ever have ideas), and maybe a just a “how my day is going” entry if I’m feelin extra fancy. I always crack myself up because if I ever write a journal entry I’ll literally try to be funny knowing full well I’m the only one who’s ever going to read it. Then I’ll go back and read what I wrote days later and be like lmao, damn I’m good. It’s pretty sad, really. Almost seems like a scene from American Psycho.
Savannah’s Travel Must-Haves
- Hand Sanitizer: Two words, THE PLAGUE
- Headphones: Simply a must unless you enjoy purgatory
- Essential Oils: Great to put on your temples and wrists!
- Notebook: If you have ideas write them down! If you don’t, write your self a good old joke. Knock knock? Who’s there? Yourself.
- Sheet Masks: If people fear you, they are weak and you are both mentally and physically superior
- Lip Balm: Bitches get crusty real quick
- Gum: Never be caught foul breathed! Or if your a dumb ass like me and forgot to buy snacks, you can use gum to not only fill the void but also give yourself the worst stomach ache ever
- Rose Water Facial Spray: Thank me later
- Charger: Forget them and face the consequences
- Power Bank: You never know when your phone will decide to yeet its battery life away
- Bioderma: It’s so nice to freshen up the old mug before landing
- Eye Drops: Shit be dry, bitches be burnin
- Ear Plugs: Crying babies materialize next to me frequently, always be prepared
- Eye Mask: For blockin out the haters
- Book: Read it up, flirt it up
- Away Suitcase: All the rich people use this bad boy so it must be good
- Packing Cubes: Never be messy again
- Toiletry Bag: An essential, the final member of the holy trinity